Freedom Found- Part one
I like to write historical fiction, so, for today's post, I'm going to be showing you the first part of a short story I wrote for a competition.
It is set in America in the 1840's, which was the time of slavery, and my main character is a slave who is seeking freedom. I've received some positive feedback on this story and I hope you enjoy it!
Freedom Found - Part One
By Bethany G. Cordle
Lucy’s breath was heavy and her heart was pounding like a drum as she ran through the woods. Alongside her was her older brother, Henry, and three more people from her plantation. Or at least, her old plantation. They had been planning this escape for a month now and it was finally happening! Lucy was on her way to Ohio and freedom!
Henry, who was running in front of her, suddenly stopped. Lucy bumped hard into him, and as she was about to apologise he motioned for everyone to be quiet.
Soon, the frightened group heard the noise that he had. That blood-curdling sound struck terror into Lucy’s heart. This particular one meant that their hegira could be jeopardised. Bloodhounds!
Everyone in the group started, once again, to run in the direction of the border. They were so close! Surely they wouldn’t get caught now?
Lucy ran as hard as she could. There was less than half a mile between them and Ohio. Were they going make it? Lucy’s hopes sank as she heard the fearsome dogs gaining on them. Fear was quickly replaced with determination. She couldn’t give up now - not after all she and her group had been through! Not after all those people had helped them. Not after they had lost a friend. There was no giving up – not now, nor ever. God had brought them this far and she felt sure that He would take them further.
Lucy looked around only to see the bloodhounds through the trees.
“Keep going” Henry yelled at the group, as he fell behind and stopped running.
Lucy knew that he would attempt to distract the dogs to allow her and the rest of the group run to safety. They both knew the penalties for getting caught and Lucy wasn’t going to keep going, letting her brother suffer the consequences alone. Henry meant the world to her and was always there when she was in trouble. Suffering with Henry would be much better than knowing she had escaped and he had been punished.
She stopped running and went back to stand by him.
“What are you doing?” Henry hollered, “Keep going!”
“Not without you Henry”, she replied firmly, “I'm not having it on my conscience you
bearing the punishment and me getting away without you. I can’t imagine a life without yo helping me!”
Henry gave a sad smile. “You go”, he said. “Your whole life is ahead of you. Now go on to Ohio, Lucy. Your life is in Ohio”
“My life is no more in Ohio than yours is, Henry”, she stated firmly.
He gave up trying to persuade her. At fourteen years old, Lucy could really be stubborn and when she had her mind set it was not easily changed.
She took a deep breath. The dogs had almost reached them.
So what do you all think?
This is only 467 words out of 1,725 so expect more posts with parts of this story!!!
Are you in suspense to read more? Do you want to see the next part of the story? What did you think of it? Was it good? Tell me in the comments! Feedback is really appreciated as long as it's said kindly. If you don't like my writing let me know! But tell me in such a way that I will feel encouraged by your feedback, rather than discouraged by your dislike! As my readers do you think it's a good story?
Thanks for taking the time to read this and remember to comment on what you think!
I'm sorry this post wasn't very long. Maybe they'll be longer in the future.